Everyone gets angry from time to time, and sometimes when our temper is aroused it feels good to “tell ‘em a thing or two.” But what about the other person? Will he or she share your pleasure? Will your belligerent tones, your hostile attitude, make it easy for the person to agree with you?
Woodrow Wilson once said, “If you come at me with your fists doubled, I think I can promise you that mine will double as fast as yours; but if you come to me and say, ‘Let us sit down and take counsel together, and, if we differ, just what the points at issue are,’ we will presently find that we are not so far apart after all, that the points on which we differ are few and the points on which we agree are many, and that if we only have the patience and the candor and the desire to get together, we will get together.”
Yes, that is a long, run-on sentence, but Woodrow Wilson’s meaning comes through clear as a bell: Attempt to find the high road to reason and you will almost always find neutral ground and points to agree on with your adversary.
Virtually all of Dale Carnegie’s Success Principles apply to this important virtue, but perhaps none more than “The Only Way to Get the Best of an Argument is to Avoid It.” Here’s an example of this important principle in action from your friends at Dale Carnegie Training Edmonton:
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